To Hear the Song of Hope
John Green has many videos about hope where he quotes a poem by Emily Dickinson
“Hope” is the thing with feathers -
That perches in the soul -
And sings the tune without the words -
And never stops - at all -
In one of them he goes on to say “notice that Emily Dickinson doesn't say a song you never stop hearing but rather a song that never stops. You might not hear the song now, but soon you will hear it again.” I have held on to those words and that poem, as my own hopeful song. When my brain gets to that place where it starts to seem like the world is too cruel, too sad, too horrifying to make it worth enduring, and I begin to feel like there is nothing I could possibly do to change anything, I remind myself that hope is the thing with feathers and that I might not hear the song now but I will hear it again.
Last week, against my better judgment, I went on Facebook and doomed scrolled for a long while, until I encountered a video of a child literally being torn from the arms of his loved ones and neighbors, and dragged into an unmarked SUV with blacked out windows. I heard voices in English and Spanish, I saw and understood their heartbreak. A woman in the background crying, begging, “please let him go, he's just a child.” I saw masked men shove and punch and insult and threaten, as if cruelty earned them a raise. And I was reminded of the kids, who less than a month ago, had to represent themselves in immigration court. No attorney, no family members, no adult help whatsoever. I think of the thirteen year old who pleaded “please don't do this to me, I have no one left” when given a deportation notice. The next day I heard the news that ICE opened fire at a car with a five year old who had to witness his father bleeding out and dying. I cried for days, and no longer could I hear the bird song.
I carry their pain as if it was my own, aware that I am an immigrant, and my child is the child of an immigrant, and cruelty could, at any point, come knocking on our door. When I think about that, I wonder if there's even a bird that sings. But my dearest friend Allison invited me to her house last Thursday, for a meet-and-greet she was hosting for a local candidate. Her family received me the same way they always have, as one of their own. Her son immediately began telling me the latest news of his life, and I heard a quiet bird song. And when I began talking to the people attending the event I realized they are just as frustrated, enraged, horrified and heartbroken as I am, but most importantly they are constantly trying their best to do what they can to make things better. They held me when I wept, and the bird sang a little louder. I talked to a Danish Man who told me “I know it is hard but you will outlive this, and then we will make things better” and the bird sang a little louder.
The tune without the words is still not very loud but it is there, and it is getting louder as I look for the helpers, as Mr Rogers told us to do. The song gets louder when I see the amazing things Mayor Zohran Mandani is doing for NYC, and I look forward to seeing other politicians following his lead. The song gets louder when I make art, and read good books (and frankly bad ones too, because what a beautiful privilege it is to have books within my reach). The song gets louder when I connect with other people, when I hug my friends, when a seven year old asks me for the recipe to my banana bread because what a delicious thing it is. It becomes almost as deafening as a murder of crows on a cliche movie about a murder, when I see my son do basically anything but mostly when he asks for a hug, when he sings while he plays, and when he announces that he is happy.
John Green also make the me hear the tune without the words that never stops, so here are some of my favorite John Green quotes about hope:
"For me hope is a decision that one has to make over and over again. To believe that one, the world and those within it matter, and two, there is cause to believe that things can get better for the world and those within it.”
“So when I talk about hope, I guess what I mean is that I have to believe that love and connection and art and collaboration are, for lack of a better word, worth it. But also, I live in hope that the human story will go on and that it will get better.”
“Life is worth the chemical energy that goes into life”
“The song of hope is still singing, I know you can’t hear it, but one day soon you will.”
I would love to hear the things that help you hear the song of hope, and if you want more John Green quotes, I have one for about any situation in life you can think of.
What am I currently reading?
I just finished listening to the “The Girl Who Drank the Moon” audiobook by Kelly Barnhill. A book about a girl who becomes magic, a government that feeds off the sorrow of its people, and most of all, it is a book about hope.
I also just finished reading “Impossible Creatures” by Katherine Rundell. A book about grief, loss, love, magic, and the responsibility to save the world.
